What is the purpose of self appreciation?
I’m often asked, what is the purpose or the ‘goal’ of self-appreciation, as if appreciating ourselves wasn’t a meaningful enough goal.
When I first started receiving my marching orders, “Appreciate yourself, there is nothing else in the world you need to do,” It felt like a relief to focus all of my attention on me for a while and off of trying to help everyone else live the easy and effortless life they were asking for. The truth is, I can’t truly serve anyone else if I don’t appreciate and value the help I am to them.
But what’s the real purpose or the bottom line of self-appreciation?
I remember when I first started contemplating the idea of having a coaching business. I thought for sure that I needed a business name other than my own name for my business. I had lunch with a friend and graphic designer who began playing with my name and my initials and within a few seconds she had created a pretty graphic that simply said, “dna.” I wasn’t sure of the look of the graphic she sketched out for me, however we both felt a huge inner YES! to “dna.” At first I thought it was simply my initials, Dawn Nocera DN and wondered what the a was about. For a while it became Dawn Nocera & Associates, but I knew that was not it since I really didn’t have any associates at the time. I tried to stretch to believe that maybe I was being guided to have more associates in the future working for me. Nothing felt quite right and the more I tried to figure out what the heck those initials stood for, the more frustrated I got.
I still hadn’t created a business, I was playing solo and I was so deep into the habit of beating myself up for not being where I wanted to be in my work, in my life, and I as much as I was helping others I couldn’t shake the feeling that I was somehow not living my life purpose, which has historically been a source of frustration for me. I needed something to help me get on my ‘right’ course. About that same time I received an invitation to attend a 4 day life-purpose mastermind event in Arizona from Baeth Davis, a scientific hand analyst. I decided that I would go and set the intention to “love myself more.”
The event was held at Miraval a magical healing spa just outside of Phoenix. So many things opened up for me during that event. Mostly because we were given space to receive more than just the work that we were doing during the mastermind event. Miraval offers spa credit with for each night you stay to use for their spa services of your choice. The first ‘miracle’ was that when I called to schedule my spa services, there was an opening for a service called, Spirit Flight with shamanic healer Tim Frank. According to the scheduling office it was ‘impossible’ to schedule this service inside of a 4 week window as he is usually booked 2 to 4 months out. I knew enough about the law of attraction to know that it was not only possible, but probable, so I asked her to look at his schedule to make sure. Sure enough there was an opening and it wouldn’t interfere with the life-purpose mastermind sessions.
Dr Frank’s spa space didn’t appear to be ‘shamanic’ It seemed very clean. There was a massage table in the middle of the room and two high back club chairs facing each other separated by a round end table near the windows. Dr Frank asked me a few questions about my family and my work. He asked me what the name of my business is and when I said, “dna” he asked what it stood for. I answered, “It’s my initials, Dawn Nocera and Associates.” He said, “No, that is not what it stands for.” I could feel myself stumbling over my reply, not sure how to respond.
I looked at him and told him, “I go to sleep at night and feel like I’ve been given the true meaning of DNA and when I wake up, I just can’t remember it!” He just sat there waiting for me to say what was next on my mind.
I leaned a little closer to him, “Do you know what DNA means for me and my work?” I could feel myself pleading a little, which has always made me feel weak and dependent. Not something I like to feel.
His response was powerful and quick. “No, but you soon will.”
For the rest of the time I was there I simply surrendered. I let go of needing to know and needing to figure it out. I let go of expectation of what would happen as a result of the experience I was about to have taking this “Spirit Flight.” I put my clothes nicely on the chair and wrapped myself in the white blanket and moved onto the massage table. I closed my eyes and let go. Every time I noticed something, I just let it go. Every time I heard something, I let it go. When my mind wanted to figure out ‘what the heck is he doing?” I let it go. At one point I was lying on my stomach on the table and the thought came to me that there has to be at least 5 people in this room doing all of this work on my body. I kept my eyes closed and I let it go. At another point when I was on my back facing upwards towards the ceiling with my eyes still closed, I felt a tiny pinch from an acupuncture needle right between my eye brows and although my eyes were closed I could see the entire universe, and I experienced myself as all that I could see. I didn’t try to figure out what was happening, I let it go too.
It was a magical experience I felt at peace with myself and with the world. I felt completely connected and aligned.
When my session was over, I walked down the path alone I heard a clear voice speak to me, “Divine Natural Alignment.”
The true meaning of DNA is “Divine Natural Alignment” Oneness.
In my life, my searching has always been a search for that connection. Some people search for facts. Facts bore me. I want to feel the deepest truth life has to offer, I want to experience the connection.
During my stay at Miraval, I experienced that connection. Every day I woke up receiving a new mantra for each day. It was so clear and so pure, that I wrote a small (just over 25 pages) ebook to share those mantras and the connection with other seekers. It is not about the book, it is about the connection, the oneness, your DNA.
When I started asking the question, “How can I help my clients understand and experience that life is so much easier than they are making it?” I again received a clear answer, “You can’t help them get it. They have to get it themselves.” And then a little extra bonus surprise, “And here are 24+ ways to activate your own DNA.” Remember DNA is your Divine Natural Alignment. With my pen in hand ready to receive, I wrote down the 24 plus simple ways to activate and turn on our own connection to Divinity as they were given to me. It was not so surprising to me that every one of he ‘ways’ was followed by “ in a state of self-appreciation without judgment, and without trying to figure it out.”
The biggest spiritual shift I’ve ever made was when I felt connected to the truth that DNA is my natural state. Years of thinking I needed to “be fixed” faded into a moment of knowing I wanted to be ‘found’ but not by anyone outside of myself. I wanted to be found by me. I wanted to uncover more and more of who I really am at my core, aligned and naturally divine.
Now every time I feel myself struggling or grasping to the conditions of life, “if you do this, then you’ll get that,” or try to force myself to do something that is so out of alignment with who I really am, I go to my inner guidance and I ask, “what do i need to do?” Every time my marching orders are the same, “Appreciate yourself, there is nothing else in the world you need to do,”
As I appreciate myself I return to that space of Divine Natural Alignment where everything is possible, where there is no BS (belief systems) polluting the air, where I am open to receive divine guidance, divine inspiration, and divine resources that are beyond my imagination.